Counter “Blip”

One of the aims of this blog is to describe those moments when happiness breaks down – its the hiccup along the way. Not to say that we going to change our focus, but we do have a sense of humor.

The following is a statement of a great conspiracy – but instead of some attempt to bring us this time we are talking about the opposite of paranoia, “the belief that others are conspiring behind your back to help you” – proanonis “the idea that the universe is a conspiracy on your behalf”. What an idea -

PRONOIA: STARTING THE YEAR WITH THESE 13 STEPS

 

1. You have license to complain and whine about anything and everything in an intense 15-minute orgy of bitching. Having spewed all your venom in one neat ritual exorcism, you’ll perhaps be free to enjoy sweet moods and broad-minded visions for a while.
2. You locate or create a symbol of your own pain. Mail it to any you want to know you are ending your dependence on their approval.
   You then conduct a sacred ritual of purification during which time you will burn that symbol to ash. While this may not banish your suffering entirely, I’m confident it will provide a substantial amelioration which you will be able to feel the benefits of within a month.
3. You eat a pinch of dirt and an edible flower petal while affirming that you are ready to kill off one of your outworn shticks — some idea or formula that has worked for you in the past but has now become a parody of itself.
4. Using crayons, paints, scissors, glue, collage materials or any other materials, you create a piece of large-denomination paper money, good for making a payment on your karmic debt.
5. You kick your own ass 22 times.
6. You take the Smart Optimists’ Personality Test, designed to reprogram you to ask questions that increase your Pronoia Quotient (PQ).
7. You brag about yourself nonstop for ten minutes. Record it so you can listen back to it later.
8. You perform a senseless act of altruism, for instance by giving an anonymous gift or providing some beauty or healing to a person who cannot do you any favors in return.
9. You deliver a concentrated stream of praise about someone, either to that person herself or to anyone who will listen. Extra credit: You force yourself to think a kind and loving thought about someone you don’t like or feel alienated from.
10. You build an altar devoted to beauty, truth, and love in one of the ugliest places you know.
11. You watch a blank TV while making up a pronoiac story featuring plot twists that are rife with happiness, redemption, and good times — yet not boring. You may either speak this tale aloud or write it down.
12. You perform a ceremony in which you get married to yourself.
13. While making love, you periodically imagine that your physical pleasure is a carrier wave for a spiritual blessing which you beam in the direction of some particular person

First, I have to acknowledge that I borrowed this piece unfortunately I don’t remember where. The other thing I that is important about this is it counter to how I feel right this minute. So in writing this I am taking a stand for how I want to see the world. How are you seeing the world? Maybe we can change our views together.

~ by Reputationist on January 2, 2007.